Yesterday, the three of us went hiking at a nearby hill. I’ve been to this hill not more than ten times but I am rather sure I recognize the entrance and the favourite trail – one that leads to a suspension bridge and valley. Being adventurous we decided to take a different trail, this time tailing behind some other hikers. Somehow too carried away with talking, we ended up arriving at a junction with several paths diverging into the woods.
Panic we were not. Took the right most path, it led to the other end of the hill. We could turn back, but we won’t. We waited. A loving couple, probably in their fifties, came up from behind and stopped for a drink. We asked if they are familiar with the trails, to our delight the pakcik (uncle in Malay) answered, “Bagus macam tu, kalao tak tahu, tanya. Pakcik tunjukkan jalan.”
We chatted with the couple along the hike until we parted our ways. Said our goodbye, not knowing whether will we be crossing path again.
After our hike, we went to the old folks home where my friend is a visiting doctor there. While he was attending to his clinic, I volunteered to feed the occupants there. The nun assigned me to feed a French priest who is bed ridden. As I was feeding him, I stared hard at his face, the face of Jesus, the face of a man who sacrificed his life for the church.
I found myself asking, “God, why God? Has not this man served you for his whole life, and why does he deserve all this? Bed ridden, unable to feed and clean himself?”
I found myself asking, “Will I ever get to have children? And if I do have children, will I ever end up like the rest of the folks here when I cannot feed and clean myself one day?”
Here I am again, at a crossroad of my life, taking a hard look at what lies ahead. Troubled. Maybe I will find an answer to this. Maybe I will meet someone who will show me the way.
Coincidence or not, I know not, but at times like this I find some solace. This morning as I was driving to work, the song Nada Te Turbe sung by the Taize community was playing from the podcast. The song, translated to English means:
Let nothing trouble you or make you afraid. Those who have God will lack nothing, God alone is enough.